Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
I just woke up with streamers wrapped around me. Glitter in my hair. My fish are swimming in empty bottles of Barcardi. Helpppp
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
Me and your penis are best friends. You don't know it, but I whisper my secrets whenever I give you blowjobs. We even have a secret handshake. We can't be separated from each other. We just can't.
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
I just folded my boss's lingerie. I need a drink and a raise
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
Randomize
