If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
Ok fuckface listen up and listen good. 1.calling dibs on a chick out of your league is like applying for a job with a highlight video 2. dont fucking ski down the stairs again 3. if you do, put it on your highlight video
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
Look, you don't know disfunction until you've sat on the john taking a shit and crying while totally sober.
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
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