Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (201): View more from New Jersey

  you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin

  (914): View more from New York

  and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston

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  (201): you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin (914): and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston http://tfl.nu/bnxc
  Replies (3) Good night (2113) Bad night (602)
• Favorite

  (912): View more from Georgia

  I swear god or herbie drove my car home

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  (912): I swear god or herbie drove my car home http://tfl.nu/eanl
  Replies (34) Good night (5024) Bad night (973)
• Favorite

  (708): View more from Illinois

  nutella sex= disaster

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  (708): nutella sex= disaster http://tfl.nu/zj5e
  Replies (26) Good night (953) Bad night (5322)
• Favorite

  (860): View more from Connecticut

  I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.

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  (860): I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared. http://tfl.nu/7yxr
  Replies (13) Good night (5590) Bad night (895)
• Favorite

  (630): View more from Illinois

  Okay, guy from work I want to fuck just told me he liked the font on my PowerPoint presentation. It is so on.

  (217): View more from Illinois

  Make me proud, climb that corporate ladder.

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  (630): Okay, guy from work I want to fuck just told me he liked the font on my PowerPoint presentation. It is so on. (217): Make me proud, climb that corporate ladder. http://tfl.nu/huht
  Replies (13) Good night (8903) Bad night (1032)
• Favorite

  (845): View more from New York

  Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.

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  (845): Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere. http://tfl.nu/7gle
  Replies (22) Good night (6389) Bad night (1365)
• Favorite

  (310): View more from California

  Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.

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  (310): Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate. http://tfl.nu/vwb7
  Replies (9) Good night (5495) Bad night (814)
• Favorite

  (270): View more from Kentucky

  Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex

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  (270): Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex http://tfl.nu/j5jn
  Replies (5) Good night (1654) Bad night (414)
• Favorite

  (360): View more from Washington

  Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious

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  (360): Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious http://tfl.nu/bk41
  Replies (2) Good night (1072) Bad night (512)
• Favorite

  (519): View more from Ontario

  I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots

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  (519): I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots http://tfl.nu/46f2
  Replies (17) Good night (1974) Bad night (436)
• Favorite

  (337): View more from Louisiana

  plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.

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  (337): plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock. http://tfl.nu/69tv
  Replies (8) Good night (442) Bad night (1057)
• Favorite

  (510): View more from California

  So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.

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  (510): So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor. http://tfl.nu/fpi2
  Replies (1) Good night (854) Bad night (237)
• Favorite

  (630): View more from Illinois

  So what's going on?

  (1-630): View more from Illinois

  We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.

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  (630): So what's going on? (1-630): We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid. http://tfl.nu/vkkl
  Replies (3) Good night (743) Bad night (318)
• Favorite

  (240): View more from Maryland

  The "don't have sex with him again" alerts you set on my phone just started going off.

  (301): View more from Maryland

  Good. "Seriously, don't do it" should start in about five minutes.

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  (240): The "don't have sex with him again" alerts you set on my phone just started going off. (301): Good. "Seriously, don't do it" should start in about five minutes. http://tfl.nu/qb2k
  Replies (3) Good night (1013) Bad night (245)
• Favorite

  (314): View more from Missouri

  I am not getting you a goat.

  (479): View more from Arkansas

  Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.

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  (314): I am not getting you a goat. (479): Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable. http://tfl.nu/eqxl
  Replies (5) Good night (885) Bad night (245)

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