God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
There needs to be a newsfeed for phones... A list of all my drunken calls, texts, BBMs, new contacts, pictures sent AND received, all in chronological order.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
So i realized that if i bought everything from my google search history for the past week i would have a dolphin, a wolf costume, a unicorn costume, a katana and a bullet proof vest. Not sure how the dolphin would fit in but the rest of it would end up in one awesome night or someone would die. Either way i say we do it.
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
Who put my cat in the fridge?
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
Randomize