As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
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