doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
Can someone please explain where the fish in the mason jar came from when we were at a bar all night?
You told the bartender if he gave you one of the fish you'd go away
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
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