Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When I tried to give you a hickey, you karate chopped me in the neck.
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
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