he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
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