It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
I just bought a large Pizza and Xanex in the same store...my night is complete
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
My life has turned into sitting in the driveway listening to Total Eclipse of the Heart while staring at the Blue Moon. Hey, August. Let's be nice. I need help.
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
Randomize
