What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
So my parents just watched me pour their rum into a bottle and only add crystal light powder, no water... Talk about being judged. All I could say was "Cortland tricks?"
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
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