omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
Then you guys just all showered together...?
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
Randomize
