so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
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