I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
He pulled out a coupon for $2.50 off the crab cakes and expected us to share that as a meal. Is that the kind of person you really see me dating?
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
Randomize
