went to the bathroom to piss, saw puke in the toilet thought wtf i dont remember puking, then turned around to find a chick i've never seen before passed out in my shower.
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
When you give the bridesmaid toast someday at my wedding I need you to quote Ricky Bobby in some form. And slip in your sister has the vagina of awesomeness. That is all.
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
Randomize
