Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
Training to be a housewife: cleaning the house and masturbating while cookies are in the oven.
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
Randomize
