So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
Drunk me made out with someone's girlfriend last night, was invited to their place for a semi-threesome, and then walked home at three am. Can't decide if this is better or worse than drunkenly challenging everyone to taekwondo sparring matches...
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
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