I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
I'm going to community service drunk, and I'm still going to be the most normal person there.
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
Any story that involves the words "bloody hand job" and/or "sliced penis" is bound to be a good one, right?
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
I butt dialed her mom while cheating on her. Needless to say Christmas will be awkward.
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
Randomize
