I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
Are you drinking alone?
no, i'm watching house
That doesn't count.
wtf, then i'm always alone
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
Randomize