Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
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