i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
you know you've been playing too much mario kart when you see a curve in the road ahead and see yourself drifting around it
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
so I finished the entire bottle...next thing I know, it's 8 am and I wake up on the fucking beach in the low tide with a family standing about 30 feet from me just staring.
Last night I ate parmesan cheese straight out of the container while watching Chelsea Lately. Look at what happens to me when you leave.
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
Randomize
