can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
Randomize
