His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
While drunk it seemed like a good idea to barricade my roommate in his room with everything that we could move in our apartment, waking up to him screaming from it collapsing on top of him was just an added bonus.
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Randomize
