i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
oh my god im such an asshole. i just asked the guitarist of bad religion if he was a scalper.
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
What is the best medium with which to say, "Happy Birthday, I'm having your abortion"... Cake? Card?
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