): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
Next person that gets my dog drunk is paying to have my carpet cleaned. I am tired of getting up to pee and stepping in dog barf.
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
Randomize
