Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
apparently i tried to put my coat in the microwave.
we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
Is there a hallmark card for "could you please slide the FUCK out of my DMs"....?
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
Randomize