My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT
I'm at subway, this 8 year old kid is judging my fashion sense with his dad. I want to kill myself.
It's ok, he's just 8, he's not judging you.
He just asked why I'm sitting alone. I honestly want to cry.
I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
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