No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
When you can pee with one hand accurately while texting, you drink too much.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Randomize