Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
My new roommate just announced that she got her period, popped a percoset, smoked a bowl, and started playing a video game. She says she's not moving till it's over. New hero?
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
Randomize