If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
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