yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
My vagina just recognized that song.
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
Randomize
