How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
When i walked in, you were in bed with a hot chick rolled up in a green blanket and said you were acting like a caterpillar..
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
Just got a message from a guy on a dating site who says he helped me remove lime pulp from my eye in a club toilet 2 weeks ago.
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
Randomize
