is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
I'm gonna have to start putting baby wipes and a change of pants in my bag. The amount of times I'm scared of shitting my pants in public is too high and I need the reassurance
Randomize
