you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
Last night you told her she was rocking the beer gut. Still wondering why you have that black eye?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need a horse. I don't think you can get a DUI on a living creature.
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
A stripper choked me last night. Then I choked her. Now we're going on a date this Saturday.
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
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