Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.
Did it?
Not as such, no.
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
There are not enough shots in the world for this. We walked in and they shouted "the pilgrims are here!" And then someone handed me a turkey leg the size of my arm.
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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