I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
We are two peas in an std pod
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
OH GOOD GOD THE BUFFALO WING SAUCE IS BURNING MY FUCKING CUNT. WHY THE FUCK DID I AGREE TO SPICY AND NOT MILD
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
Randomize
