pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
He made a fake guest pass that was just a note card with "I'm here. Me." written in sharpie, and tried to convince the security guard it was real.
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
