That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
25 People Confess Their Favorite Way To Annoy Their Significant Other
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
I'm on the strip, it's like a mini new years eve. Some girl just got taken away on a stretcher with her meter margarita in her hand claiming it's trophy for being awesome. Damn tourists are lightweights.
I'm pretty sure I just overheard my boss call his sperm precious metal...
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
Upon further investigation it turns out it wasn't blood, but chocolate frosting from the cupcake I shoved in my pocket to "save for later"
These 21 Women Share What Sexual Harassment In The Military Is Really Like
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed