dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
i came on her dog
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
As i was walking home this morning some old lady was walking her dog and i said hello to her as our paths in life met, then i proceeded to puke in someones front yard and never looked back
No dude I got way too drunk to function. 90% sure I tried to FaceTime 911.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
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