The funny thing about my wife cheating on me is that the guy probably has genital warts now. Sweet.
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
I was fine until "Under Pressure" came on the radio. It's like God wanted me to shit my pants on the drive home.
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
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