I was to big spoon the shit out of you right now
I'm so hungover and dru,k
giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
There's a skateboard on the patio and all the chips are gone. The note on the fridge says 'don't buy cheese'. Stop letting her go outside.
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
Randomize
