Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
I'm babysitting and we're watching Barney and I don't understand why Barney can magically make band hats appear but he makes them make shitty ass instruments.
Barney's a jerk
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
We're the only two others left at work. My internal monologue is going: TAKE ME. TAKE ME NOWW. ON THE COUNTER. IN FRONT OF THE MANAGER. JUST TAKE MEEE
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
My boss just offered me a vodka mixed drink at work I do not have a real job
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
Randomize
