I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
Randomize