I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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