wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
Remind me never to smoke before babysitting again. Ate an entire bottle of children's gummy vitamins.... not an easy thing to explain to parents.
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
Naked. naked and bneed help.
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
Randomize