my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
If I die tonight somebody's going to have to let all my tinder matches know.
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
Randomize