He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
So apparently I ran down the hall to another party and started handing out uncooked spaghetti to strangers. You'd be surprised how many drunk people will eat raw noodles.
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
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