Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
I am literally drinking 7 day old water and looking for snacks in my room so I won't have to go in the hall and see roommate, because we accidentally banged last night. Please bring over some chicken and plan b.
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
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