would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
There are drunk kids outside our building hugging that cop that's always on his bike as he's citing them for public drunkenness. It's not even 11 am.
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
Randomize
