I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
I just took a dump by candlelight. I feel like a pilgrim.
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
Randomize
