I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
Gym?
Sweet baby Jebus, no. I'm Motley Crue hungover. This must be how it feels to rail a line of ants.
He sent me a snap chat of his naked torso with cookies over his nipples. Like.... that does not make me want you homeboy.
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
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