walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
it's like heaven, but drunker
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
Literally everyone in the bar was absolutely hammered out of their minds. I swear I even saw the bartender swigging jd when he thought no one was looking. And there was me thinking Britain was the booziest nation in the world.
Welcome to America. You're gonna love it.
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
Randomize
