the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
Don't send me heart emojis when you're jacking off.
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
Can you please stop fucking every bartender in the city? Just once I want to have a Jack and Coke without fielding questions about your availability.
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
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